The subtle and quiet art of non-resistance to paternalism

Sound scene:
TAP---TAP---TAP--TAP
---my father's spoon against his dish.
clink-clink-clink........

We practice denial and non-confrontation daily:
If it's too much trouble,  don't do it, just forget it.


It's hard to say that when basic food stuffs are in question.
but if you say it often enough.....


"Don't bother if it's so much trouble...."


----giving in at the least sign of resistance----


If you say that,


If you use that strategy,


for, say, fifty years of your life.....


avoiding all possible conflict.....


quickly retreating...


"We didn't want to impose..."


In the end, you preserve a mythology of independence,


(Although sometimes you can't resist commenting,
complaining, and interfering......)


But you can maintain a mythology until


you fall flat,


lose consciousness,


and wake up in a pool of blood,




in the post office,


lose your short term memory.....


And now you've simply got to have help,


and all the while,


you will continue to say,


"I don't want to be a bother."


Then again I wonder,


If a woman spends her entire life giving in to the wishes and whims of her husband,
doesn't she have a right to practice the subtle art of quiet resentment?


What other survival tool is available to her?  (psychologically speaking)


Just as in the workplace,


you've got to give in when your boss or manager tells you what to do,


Or when the Commanding Officer makes an order,


Or when the King threatens to cut your head off,


As I was told once by a Tenured Professor of Philosophy,


"Never argue with the Administration!."




(Corrected, expanded, revised 27 May 2012)